************************THE UNOFFICIAL ANGST CODE**************************
what is angst? [A]
(++) Anxiety, anguish, neurotic fear
(+)  severe depression
(=)  guilt, remorse
(-)  insecurity
(--) boredom

Is your angst primarily emotional or intellectual? (EI)
(++) I'm concerned with cruelty and suffering of all people in this world
(+) I'm concerned with cruelty to me and my own suffering
(=) I don't care about anything
(-) I like to think of myself as philosophically inclined
(--) I like to contemplate the Great Sucking Void of Existence

why do you read this group? (AA)
(++) heh heh, lookit how pathetic these losers are
(+) it's like driving by a pileup on the freeway with bodies
    smeared all over the pavement
(=) I'm truly Angstful
(-) I read alt.angst for the moral and emotional support
(--) this is one of the first groups alphabetically

how do you escape your feelings of angst? [E]
(++) I escape them through drugs, sex, alcohol, entertainment
(+) I try to intellectualize them away
(=) I don't. I wallow in them.
(-) I don't. I enjoy them.
(--) I try to find ways to make them worse.

what are your feelings about suicide? [S]
(++) if everyone did it the world would be better off
(+) if I did it the world would be better off
(=) if I did it I'd be better off
(-) I'm in favor of suicide for everyone but me
(--) suicide should be punishable by the death penalty

what would be your preferred suicide method? [SM]
(++) drive my fast car off a cliff
(+) drive my fast car into a cliff
(=) shotgun, dood, like my hero Kurt Cobain
(-) strap explosives to my chest and run into the Capitol Building
(--) long slow death by nicotine, sloth, obesity, and food additives

have you actually attempted suicide? [SA]
(++) yes, I have successfully attempted suicide
(+) I have seriously attempted suicide but was rescued
(=) I have pretended to attempt suicide as a way of getting attention
(-) I have not actually attempted suicide but I tell people I did because I
   think it impresses them with my angstfulness
(--) I have neither attempted suicide nor considered doing so.

Religion [R]
(++) religious
(+) recovering Catholic
(=) recovering fundamentalist Christian
(-) pagan, all the way
(--) I'm way into Star Trek

Why do Chicks Dig Jerks(TM)? [CDJ]
(++) I'm a Chick and I don't dig Jerks.
(+) I'm a Chick and I do dig Jerks.
(=) the real question is why do Jerks Dig Chicks?
(-) I'm a Jerk so I don't need to ask that question.
(--) How do I become a Jerk?

how smart are you? (IQ)
(++) I am way smarter than Chia
(+) I am smarter than Chia
(=) I am Chia
(-)  I have compared IQs with Chia
(--)  I have publicly mentioned one of my test scores

how pathetic are you? [P]
(++) I am not pathetic at all
(+) I am not pathetic at all, I swear
(=) I read alt.angst
(-) I post on alt.angst
(--) I am tabulating my angst.code right now

my feelings about posting when drunk [PWI]
(++) other people think my posts are better
(+) I think my posts are better
(=) I think tony's posts are better
(-) my posts are worse
(--) I just threw up on the keyboard

does TheDavid like you? [TD]
(++) TheDavid is waging a permanent, personal war against me
(+) TheDavid occupies a permanent, personal space in my killfile
(=) TheDavid doesn't know who I am
(-) TheDavid likes me
(--) TheDavid is moving to be near me

what is the deal with theDavid, anyway? (TDTD)
(++) he's a brilliant fake
(+) He's a ridiculous fake
(=) he's a psycho
(-) he's a genius
(--) who's theDavid?

Melia [M]
(++) I was screwed over by Melia
(+) I'm moving to be near Melia
(=) I think Melia is dating me exclusively
(-) Melia has sent me flirty email. I think she wants to date me.
(--) who's Melia?

How do you feel about the quality of posts lately? [Q]
(++)the quality is definitely going down
(+)it's not very high
(=)the posts suck lately
(-)alt.angst used to be much better than this
(--)is it me, or do all the posts lately suck?

what is your obsession? [O]
(++) the OneTrueLove who screwed me over
(+) redheads (email lmm5@cornell.edu)
(=) fast cars
(-) sailing
(--) myself

lmm5@cornell.edu
A++ EI- AA+ E+ S- SM2 SA- R+ CDJ+ IQ++ P- PWI- TD++ TDTD= M- Q++ O--